Stubborn or too in love with your ex? Whatever your reasons, learn how to effectively get him again.
How to get your ex back is something a lot of people would consider and indulge in especially if they’ve been blindsided by the whole breakup. Such is the case that some people are just not ready to call it quits. Hence, the Internet is amassed with a myriad of tips and trick on how to get your ex back. I’ve personally used some of these techniques, but halfway through it, I kind of realized I wasn’t really too keen on getting the person back. Which brings us to my point – make sure it is exactly what you want before embarking on this quest.
Sometimes, dented pride and ego are often the reason why you want to try to get your ex back. A part of us just can’t accept getting dumped. But for those who genuinely want to rekindle old passions, it’s doable, but still, keep in mind the possibility of rejection. There’s no rejection-proof when it comes to relationships – any aspect of it. Whether to get a new guy/girl or to get your ex back, there is always that possibility of getting rejected.
Getting your ex back involves mind games. Sad, but true. I stay as far away as I can from these games, but sometimes a guy or a girl’s got to do what he or she’s got to do. Just keep it close to real and honest and pain-free. You don’t want to inflict yourself with more pain which is often a by-product of mind games.
Also, in your quest to getting your ex-partner back, never forsake your pride or ego. You still have both; don’t give him or her that much power over you by giving it all away in trying to get him back. Bottom line, don’t grovel; chase him or her but don’t appear like it.
First thing you need to do is to evaluate things clearly. This means you have to put yourself in your ex’s shoes. Being in his or her shoes, would you still like to be with the person that you are now? If something wasn’t off with you, chances are your partner wouldn’t have left you – unless of course he or she is just a world class asshole or a straight-up bitch.
Again, we are talking real relationships here, not a quick fuck or this week’s favorite, so mind the smartass comments about it being all sex. Going back, I highly advised doing a complete overhaul before trying to win your ex-partner’s attention again. Don’t settle on the aesthetics alone, that’ll only make you appear loser-like and pitiful.
Most probably it was your character that has a problem so you can amend this by going through all your weaknesses and flaws. If you’re the possessive type, lose the Neanderthal act, it’s not cute; if you’re the insecure girlfriend, eat some confidence because no guy will ever make you feel secured lest you feel it first. Mentally, psychologically and emotionally polish them all up. Bonus points if you improve yourself physically and get smoldering hot.
Be Yourself. Do not ever dare to change to imitate the person whom you think he is attracted with. Remember, he liked you for who you are before, so there is no reason for you to change who you are just to get him back. In case you would change, make sure that it is for the intention of making yourself a better person after the breakup.
Stay distant. Fight the desire to pick up the phone. Calling him to get back with him immediately after the breakup is a dumbass move. It is one way of showing just how desperate you are to win him back. Do not call. Do not send SMS. Stop checking his Facebook profile every now and then. Erase his email address in your email listing. Regardless of the intense desire you have of doing this and that, forget it.
Keep your pride. You can do this by avoiding any still-so-much-in-love-with-you indications. When you see him in social gatherings or public places, don’t stay close to him. Show him that you can enjoy the company of others and you can continue living even without him. It is time to revive your social life so that you no longer have to cling to the thought of the breakup. Even in public places, you have to keep in mind the distance reminder that was mentioned earlier. You need to make sure that you are in control of your emotions or else, your plan of getting him back is bound to fail.
Keep in constant touch with his friends. With the request that they would keep it a secret, discreetly ask how your ex is doing. If he is fine and with someone else, forget about getting him back. If friends say he is still single and is having a hard time coping with the breakup, this is a slight hint that you still have a chance to be together again.
Be patient. Wait before making the first move. Give him the space he wants and allow him to have a reality check on his own. Wait for the right time to get in touch with your ex. Do not display any emotion when you meet, any sign of emotion might make your ex turn his back because he doesn’t want to deal with that emotional person ever again.
Jus because you are trying to get your ex back doesn’t mean you have to continue where you left off. Do not dwell on the past. Just try in the most subtle manner, to relay about the happy times you’ve shared. Reminiscing on the good parts is an effective way on getting him back.